Archive for » 2008 «
Note: This event took place in Louisville, Kentucky right after a big storm ravaged the city and left many without utilities for many days.
A mother was rushing down the street, young child in tow. As she passed a line of parking meters, she saw a young woman digging in her purse, look pained, then turn around and start digging in her car. Her frustration and upset was obvious. The mother stopped and watched about 20 seconds then said, softly, “Excuse me?”
The frantic woman came out of her car and looked around a little annoyed at being interrupted in her digging. The mother held out some small change. “I think you may have need of this? Please take what you need.”
The look of gratitude on the frantic woman’s face was something to behold. She said, “I can’t find any change for the meter. I have to get in there before closing time and pay my water bill. I was
busy cleaning up after the storm and forgot to get down here. I simply cannot afford a parking ticket this month.”
The mother said, holding out the change, said “I understand. Breathe. Here, take this, please.”
The frantic woman was hesitant, but then she agreed that she probably only needed 35 cents, which she took and hurried on her way.
The child asked the mother, “Why did you give that woman money, and how did you know she she didn’t have change for her meter?”
Mother said, “She pulled into that meter just as we were getting out of the car. She was digging in her purse and in her car all the time we were putting money in the meter. I just guessed that she didn’t find meter change. I also guessed, that as she is parked right in front of the water department,
that her water was disconnected and she needed to get it paid so her water could be turned back on quickly. It is almost closing time. If she didn’t get in there quick, they would be closed and she would have to come back tomorrow. That is why we were in such a hurry. I had change, so I gave it to her.”
Child: “You mean like us? Did you know her?”
Mother: “Yes. Like us. I always pay the water bill online. But because we did not have power when I got paid, I was busy worrying about not having power and forgot to pay the water bill. So we are here to get ours turned back on. No. I have never seen her before.”
Child: “Why did you give her money?”
Mother: “I recognized her need, I had change, so I gave it to her. It seemed the right thing to do at the moment. It wasn’t much, but it made a world of difference to her, it was all she needed at that moment.”
Child: “But if you dont know her, how will she pay it back?”
Mother: “You can’t pay back such a kindness. You can only pay it forward. I hope that someday when she sees someone else in need that she will be reminded of the kindness in her time of need and will help as she can. Besides, I felt well paid by the gratitude and the look of relief on her face. Did you see how big her smile was? Do you remember that time on the highway when we had a flat? A man that we did not know stopped to help us change the tire? That was really a good thing because I could not get the jack out and my cell phone was not working. Remember?”
Child: “Yes. Was this like that?”
Mother: “Yes. I feel that by giving this woman meter change, that I partially paid the flat changing kindness forward and I hope that woman will do the same when she meets someone in need.”
Child: “Why do people help strangers?”
Mother: “Hmmm. Because it makes them feel good inside to help someone they don’t know who they know cannot ever pay them back directly. Because most people that help others believe they make the world a better place by helping, by offering a helping hand. Because, probably, at some point, someone else helped us and so we feel almost honor bound to help when and where we can. Because it feels like the right thing to do. Because we know that when we help others at some point, somewhere down the road, that kindness is returned to us in ways we could not even imagine or expect. There are probably lots of other reasons that I can’t think of right now. We call it Random Acts of Kindness.”
Child: “Oh. OK. … When I pushed that little girl on the merry-go-round the other day was that Random Act of Kindness?”
Mother: “Yes.”
Child: “And when I took my sister’s laundry out of the dryer and folded it? Was that a Random Act of Kindness?”
Mother: “Yes. If you didn’t expect to get paid for it.”
Child: “And when I picked up the book that lady dropped?”
Mother: “Yes. Why did you do those things?”
Child: “The little girl asked me to push her. I guess my sister will do the same thing for me, maybe, some day. But I guess I don’t care if she does. The lady didn’t seem to know she dropped her book.”
Mother: “How did it make you feel when you did those things? And did you know all of those people?”
Child: “I felt good. I felt happy. No. I knew my sister. I didn’t know any of the others. A bigger kid came by and told me to get on and he would push us both. I held the little girl and we hung on together and he pushed us really fast. That was really fun. I like helping people.”
Mother: “And that is why other people help people, even those they don’t know.”
Child: “OK.” And she ran on ahead to hold the door open for a lady with a cane.
I hope this is a lesson the child will use in her own life. In the past, she usually felt like if she did something for someone that they owed her some type of payment. I hope after this discussion that she will not feel as if someone should pay her for every thing she does.
Anonymous, Louisville, Kentucky, USA
Wow…it is amazing how opportunities for kindness are anywhere and everywhere. Today I went to the bank to deposit my paycheck (the one I thought I wouldn’t get untiil Tuesday since I get paid on the last day of the month and there is a holiday to account for). As I stood in line, waiting for my turn, I couldn’t help but overhear another woman in line. She was trying to deposit some money and take some out at the same time. However, her account had been in an overdraft status for so long bank rules wouldn’t allow her to take money out.
I heard a voice say to give this woman $100…now mind you, that is a real stretch for me AND I had declared I was living in abundance. And here it was, my opportunity to live up to that intention. I chose to give this woman, who was going through a divorce and had a small child too, the $100. When she said I must be an angel, I said “no, a divorced mom who raised 5 small boys and knows what it is like to go to the bank and have no money”.
She asked for my name and, although I gave her my card, it was so she could call me if you needed me, or needed help. Not because I wanted anyone to know. Because, you see, it was a kindness to me to do this…it was a reminder to me to live in abundance, knowing all would be perfect.
Anonymous, California
I parked my car, and there was a young chap with an empty cart for my use! I thanked him, and he waited while I pulled out my own cloth bags from my back seat. His next question was “Do you need any help?” I said no, but thanked him again for his out of the ordinary courtesy and attentiveness.
My heart felt warm and light, and as I walked with the “blessed” cart into the store, I received a Spirit prompt to let the store manager know. I told my story, and was asked to write it out on a little card. I was given his name, and was told that the young man would be given special recognition.
Whee……as the Staples commercial says, “That was EASY!”
Jean, McHenry, Illinois
Funny, I have been kinda quiet lately…and I apologize! I’ve been knee deep in alligators figuring out how to create a motivational speaking and coaching business and have been neglecting my kindness focus.
I got an interesting question and realized I hadn’t thought about it. “What do you consider kindness?”. I started rattling off all sorts of examples, stories, blah, blah, blah (not always the best at brevity). That is when I realized it is actually something simple: it is something that feels good to me and has no strings!
So, what is your definition of kindness? What does kindness look like? Feel like? Sound like? It is such a personal thing and yet it is something we share.
Since it is sometimes hard to remember all the kindnesses that happen during the day, what would you think of a “kindness log” or “kindness journal”? Maybe even something like those tablets that my mom kept by the frig…there was already a list with things like “milk, bread, juice, carrots”, etc. and all you needed to do was put a little checkmark beside what you needed. And, of course, there was a place to write in things that weren’t on the list. Remember those?
What got me thinking of this idea was sitting in the airport for endless hours waiting for delayed flights. I took out a notebook and started writing stuff I was seeing and doing. I realized that writing it helped me remember it…even if I didn’t remember to put it on this site. And I’m guessing many of you are the same way. Yes? No? Maybe?
I was thinking of something similar for kindnesses…done for you or by you. You could keep a log of them and use it to keep yourself focused on the kindnesses. How way kewl would it be to look back through the day and see that you’ve said “thank you to 5 strangers” or “10 strangers smiled at me”?
Whatcha think…would it help us all see the kindnesses all around us?
After spending one too many nights awake and agonizing over a toothache, I reluctantly made the trip to my dentist’s office. To my dismay, I was informed that a root canal was in order. My dentist’s office did not perform root canals, so I was given the number for several local endodontists. Apparently root canals were “in season…because nobody was available until at least one month
later. I made my distant appointment and decided to wait it out.
Two days later (and two very long nights), I took my daughter back to the dentist’s office for a routine cleaning. I told the Office Manager about the terrible pain that I was still in, and the difficulty I was having finding someone to put an end to it.
The Office Manager (my super hero) immediately left her desk and found a dentist that could perform my root canal for me at that very moment. He had performed root canals in the past, but the office had made a business decision not to do so any longer. In my case, they made an exception.
Not only did they bring me out of the pain I was in, but I had my toddler with me that day and nobody was available to watch him. The Office Manager took him into her office and entertained him for the
two hours that it took to complete my root canal.
Now that is exceptional service!
Anonymous. Florida, United States